Far Too Long
by Tea Oxenstierna
Summary: 'Would it be better if I wants here' 'Maybe the world will be better off without a failed short-lived ex-nation.' Plagued by these thoughts, and a dark voice in her head, can anyone make Con realize that the world would not be better without her? Or will the former nation succumb to these toughs and take someone with her? Rated M for death, suicide, self harm, and language.


**_This is my first super sad fic. I thought about it while browsing ZeroChan and finding several Sad! Hetalia pics. So, please be nice and don't kill me for any grammar or spelling, this is kind of a spur of the moment thing. So, enjoy and have fun reading~! (And just a heads up, I am not insensitive with these things, some of them are actual thoughts that have been in my head. I don't think anyone should feel this way and if they do, know that there is always someone who sees you as their light in the dark.)_**

* * *

_What's the point anymore?_ I thought bringing the sharp blade from my pocket. _Would anyone miss me? I doubt it. Not even Canada notices me. I'm just a useless ex-nation who has no right to still be alive._ I thought even more glumly pulling my shirt sleeve up. I looked over the previous attempts that littered my pale skin. Red scars,fairly recent, silver scars, old, and cuts scabbed over. _I can't believe that it's came to this. What will everyone else think?_ I shook my head and sighed in frustration. _No. No one will think anything. They will all just carry on. I was nothing. I am still nothing. I was a short lived, pathetic, worthless excuse for a nation._ I think darkly. I longed for the release that death could bring. But I was a coward. I sat on the floor of the bathroom in my home. The blade of the sharp knife was shaking violently in my hand. **_Do it! Stop being such a fucking bitch and do it! No one loves you, who would care if you died?!_** The voice in my head screamed at me. I put the blade at the very visible blue-purple veins that laced my right wrist. I whined a little as the freezing cold steel bit into my skin and into my wrist. The pain soon faded as the hot blood gushed out. I sighed and dug the blade in further. When the blood didn't stop, and was flowing like a tap, wide open, i moved to the other wrist, and repeated the process. I dropped the knife and lay my hands at my sides. I could feel the cold of the bathroom start to disappear. _I-I wish that someone had really cared about me. Why did it have to end like this?_ I wondered, warm tears falling down my face. **_Because you are a waste of space and air on this Earth. You are not loved, what does it matter?_**The voice bellowed. My tears fell harder and faster now, but i was too weak to even wipe them away.

"I-I don't want to die!" I wailed suddenly, but weakly. **_'You don't want to die'? You sicken me!_**The voice spat. I cried more, but i was getting still weaker. _I guess I'm going to die after all. Alone, and unwanted..._ I thought grimly.

* * *

"You sure about this Bruder?" Germany asked me. I looked at him with feigned sock.

"How can you doubt me so?" I asked placing a hand over my heart in a feigned attempt at heart ache.

"You know what I meant. I only mean that getting their blessing will be difficult." Germany muttered. I laughed.

"They can't be too bad. After all, France knows already." I said calmly. We stopped outside of the meeting room.

"Just be cautious Bruder." Germany said looking me in the eye as I opened the door.

* * *

"What?! Dude, no way!" America shouted at my question.

"America, it isn't like he's going to kill her." Canada muttered.

"Thanks Canada." I said to the quiet nation. He nodded.

"There is no WAY this-this, ruffian! Is going any where with her!" He yelled nearly hitting me square in the face.

"Chill out! Why don't you and England come as well?" I suggested, not needing him angry at me for taking her anyway.

"Come now America, we haven't gone out an ages. If you see his intentions your self will you be content then you git?" England asked annoyed. America begrudgingly nodded. I sighed.

"Go find her. Bring her here." He growled. I nodded and hurried out of the room, West on my heels.

"Where do you think she is?" He asked.

"I saw her heading to the rest room. Perhaps we should check there." I said quickly.

"You are more eager Bruder. Is the thought of going out with her really that big of a deal to you?"

"West! That would be like me asking if your dates with Italy were big deals! We both know they are!" I said truly hurt. He sighed and apologized.

"Here's the bathroom. Should we knock first?" I asked, receiving a look from my little brother. I did so and we waited. There was a choked sob from the other side of the door.

"You think she's hurt?" I asked panicking. Something didn't feel right.

"I think something is wrong." He said. I pounded on the door and didn't get a response. I gave in and kicked the door in.

"Mein Gott!" I yelled running to the form on the floor.

"Go get help!" I yelled at a pale Germany. I picked up the delicate frame. Her eyes fluttered slightly.

"Con?" I asked fearing the worst. I pulled my coat off and tore in to strips and tying them tightly around the deep gashes.

"P-Pru...?" Her voice was so weak. I nodded pulling her close to me, putting my head between her shoulder and neck and her head in the same spot on me.

"Confederate, why did you..." I couldn't hardly speak from the tears that had begun to fall from my eyes.

"I-I'm a-always unknown. I-I thought that the w-world w-would b-better off with o-out m-me." She softly sighed. I shook my head quickly.

"No, it would be worse. Confederate, I-I don't want you to die!" I cried clutching her closer. Her body was so cold.

"I-I d-don't want t-to die either." She muttered. I began to let my tears fall faster. I pulled her away from me and them pressed our foreheads together. I looked into her dull eyes that were once such a beautiful blue. I kissed her quickly on the lips.

"I love you Confederate. You don't know how much. I-I've just been too nervous to tell you." I whispered. Her lips twitched in a small smile.

"I-I love you t-too P-Prussia." She whispered.

"Gilbert." I said softly.

"W-what?"

"My name, is Gilbert." I repeated. She sighed and a tear fell from her eyes.

"M-My n-name i-is A-Anna Lee." She mumbled. Her words slurring together. I put my hand on her face, she was freezing, her teeth were chattering together.

"It is nice to meet you Anna Lee." I said. She smiled a bit, I was happy, that she smiled.

"G-Gilbert... I-I'm s-sorry. I-I g-guess I-I s-screwed e-everyt-thing up, d-didn't I?" She asked with a hint of spiteful humor.

"No. You didn't screw anything up. I can't imagine being in your situation. You are forgotten more than Canada. I should have said something sooner." I quietly cried. She let a weak laugh out.

"I-It's a-alright. I-I don't f-feel t-the pa-pain an-anym-more." She muttered.

"Anna, please... don't go. You can't go, please, I-I need you." I sobbed.

"I-It's a-alright. I-I w-will s-se-ee you s-soon. I-I l-love y-you, G-Gilbert... I-" She stopped talking and fell limp in my arms. I began to shake, she was gone. I laid her down gently and stormed off the take my anger out on someone. I burst into the room and found America, England, Canada, France, and Germany talking away. they stopped when they saw me covered in blood and infuriated.

"B-Bruder-"

"Shut up!" I yelled at him, forcing him to shrink away.

"Who's blood is that Prussia dude?" America asked. I turned to him.

"Confederate's." I spat.

"What the hell did you do?" He roared.

"Don't fucking start with me! She cut her wrists because all of you seem to think that just because she was a dissolved nation she was not worthy of being remembered! Well I remembered her! She died in MY arms! She thought it would be best if the world was rid of her! Don't you blame it on me! WEST!" I shouted turning to him. "I asked you to go get help! Not run your damned mouth! She could have been saved if you had done as I asked!" I screamed at him. Composing myself even a little I turned back to the door.

"If you think that dissolved nations are worthless, then I will leave now." I said simply. I walked back to the bathroom and looked at Anna. She didn't deserve that. I pulled the small pistol out of my boot. West insisted that I carry it. I was glad now. I sat nest to her and laced my fingers with her cold ones.

"You were right Anna. I will see you soon." I said softly cocking the gun and putting it to the side of my head.

* * *

There was a resounding bang and all of the nations took off out of the room. Germany lead the group to the bathroom where he immediately felt sick. His brother was sitting next to the corpse of a young woman. They were in a large pool of blood that was growing by the second. The blood pouring from the gun shot in his brother's head was adding to the blood on the floor. He didn't need to go near him to know his brother was dead, the wound showed that perfectly, the blood staining his white hair crimson. Germany ducked out of the room, unable to comprehend the sight. He left the other four to gawk at the terrible sight.

* * *

Reading the paper the next day, Hungary and Austria were surprised by an article. **_Two commit suicide._**Hungary broke down when she saw Prussia's picture below it. Austria silently wept for the loss of his frienemy.

* * *

The next world meeting was full of sorrow for the loss of Prussia. A small memorial was held for him, nations talking about him and placing flowers at his grave, ignoring the smaller one next to his. All except for seven nations. Iceland, Norway and Denmark all paid their respects the the Confederate States of America before leaving. Russia left soon after. Finland and Sweden went to leave and urged Sealand to say what he needed to. The micronation walked to the stone and placed a brought of Dogwood on the stone.

"Happy Birthday Auntie Annie." He said before walking away with Sweden and Finland.

* * *

**_So, this is what happens when I look at things late at night. Seriously it's 4am. I NEED TO SLEEP (but i dont wanna...) Any way... hope you enjoyed. Reviews will be considered the same as Sealand's touching moment with Auntie Annie~!_**


End file.
